Greater love: A space for belonging
Kim’s office during an early morning in late September. Photo credit: Kim Verriere
In her second half of life, Trained Spiritual Director Kim Verriere began to recognize her need for deeper conversations. She longed for a place where she didn’t feel the need to filter herself. She wanted a space where she could wonder, be curious, be herself.
As an Enneagram 2 and empath, Verriere also saw this as a need for others.
Where could people gather and share ideas, sacred stories? A place where they didn’t have to get dogma right, somewhere to go where there weren’t boxes to check in order to belong?
In December 2016, this prayer and desire manifested into Verriere founding Greater Love Collective (GLC), a nonprofit community where individuals might grow into deeper and broader expressions of themselves in the world. Her main goal was and still is to provide resources focusing on soul work, creativity and activism.
During this time, Verriere says she was noticing a culmination of many thing: division caused by the 2016 election, people seeking respite and answers outside of the formal church. She also recognized an old part of her calling begin to emerge - creating a loving, accepting environment for others.
A community partner of Retreat House Spirituality Center, Verriere works with several directees through her spiritual direction practice. We visited with her to learn more about her sacred story and ministry including the how and why of what she does. Enjoy!
Retreat House: How did you get into the ministry of spiritual direction?
Verriere: Now that I’m thinking about it, I would say it started as a kid. I have always been drawn to holding space for others. I have always liked deep and meaningful conversations. I founded Greater Love Collected in 2016 not in response to the election that was happening but because I had reached a place in my journey where I was no longer able to explore some of my bigger questions in a church environment. And, through GLC, I met a spiritual director whom I began seeing for direction. Up until that point, I hadn’t even heard of spiritual direction. After being a directee for about two years, I thought I think I could do this (RH editorial team: be a director)!
“I was looking for something that could hold me, and spiritual direction offered that to and for me.”
Retreat House: You began the Certification in Spiritual Direction (CSD) from Perkins at SMU in 2018 and now have several directees and love the work that you are doing. Will you share some about this passion?
Verriere: My original call, going all the way back to when I was a young girl, I have felt is to help others spiritually or point others to God.
Retreat House: It sounds like GLC and your spiritual direction work are very intertwined.
Verriere: Absolutely. Wanting to offer safe places for others to grow and be nutured is what led me to start Greater Love Collective. I noticed that the church couldn’t hold me anymore. It didn’t know what to do with me. There wasn’t a place for me there any longer, for my wonderings, my faith explorations.
I am not connected to church formally right now. In a sense, church is still my family, my heritage and my tradition but it has been about four years since I attended regularly. I don’t hide that from people, and I don’t shout from rooftops. I just let it be.
Retreat House: In what ways if any do you think this impacts your ministry?
Verriere: For some directees, I believe they might need me to be connected to a church in order to feel comfortable meeting with me. I want all of my directees and potential directees to have an accurate understanding of where I am coming from. If I know that this is something that require in a director, then I would let them know. For others, they might be more comfortable knowing I don’t attend a church right now. It could even be freeing for them.
Retreat House: I’m noticing that by you being faithful to your journey and call and path, that others will respond accordingly. It sounda like trust in God and self.
Verriere: Thank you! I believe it is.
I do think we are made for community and are meant to (and excuse the overdone phrase) “do life” together. Right now, have found this in other places like Greater Love Collective, with a groups of friends. There are places that I get these things. I don’t feel lacking.
Spiritual growth, feeling connected to God and community – I am fine with finding a church where I discovered those things. Right now, it is totally okay not to have it there. I don’t have this need. I feel very connected.
Retreat House: Tell me about more about GLC and what connects in this space for you.
Verriere: Greater Love Collective’s main purpose is to for us to be able to engage in conversation in things that matter to us in a safe environment apart from church Our conversations are not always what I would label as spiritual although I kind of think everything is spiritual. They are about topics that help us to grow as humans and souls. In some ways it kind of feels like group spiritual direction. Our conversations and offerings provide opportunities for individuals to share what’s going on and receive feedback or share without feedback.
Retreat House: Why is this work significant now?
Verriere: I have an evangelical background but not super fundamental. Moderate Baptist. At one time, I was very interested in the emerging church movement. These were people noticing things needed to shift, noticing that we weren’t living out what we said were living out as Christians as far as loving others. Not a whole lot of activism or practicle application happening. I was always drawn to missions and emergence movement.
Then, I started to ask the question why are people leaving church? And then recognizing the blindness of this. It is a very exclusive culture. You have to check certain boxes to be fully in. I noticed that this had become a sort of Gospel.
Around this same time, I began noticing other third spaces popping up that had a soul-based feel that were not churches - places like Retreat House. I filed my paperwork for GLC in 2016, and our first official gathering happened in January 2017. There were some people that thought I started the organization in opposition to what was happening politically but they were unrelated.
“I think God was creating these spaces that were bubbling up because He knew people would need a place to go, to feel safe.”
Retreat House: You sensed a need for greater love and GLC was born, and it sounds like out of that work your ministry and call as a spiritual director was also born. What does the phrase greater love mean to you?
Verriere: I think it is inclusive. There are no barriers, there is nothing you have to do when you are in the flow of love to earn it, to receive it. It is free.
Retreat House: Is the flow of love one of the ways you describe God?
Verriere: Yes! I also use Mystery, Divine and my favorite these days is Big Mama.
I also still identify as a Christian. It is my background, the language I speak still, what I know, what I grew up with and what made me into who I am. As I wrestled with that, I concluded that I’m not anything else. I identify as spiritual but not religious. When asked, I’ll answer:
“I do follow the way of Jesus. That is still my main avenue.”
Retreat House: Thank you for sharing some of your story with me. Knowing you and your ministry and something that is has grown and continues to grow, I would love to hear how you describe spiritual direction?
Verriere: Ah, yes. For me, I think it boils down to wanting to help others remember who they are. And, I know that as spiritual directors, it can be tough to come up with a way to explain this ministry to others. My recommendation is to try things out. If people don’t connect with how you’re explaining direction, then try something new next time. Get clear with want you want to communicate, what you want directees to know you can offer and what you are comfortable talking about and how. You can tweak and tweak some more. Keep practicing until you find your voice and it feels authentic to you.
Retreat House: In closing, what is your biggest challenge and your biggest joy as it relates to your role as a spiritual director?
Verriere: For me, my biggest challenge is that I want to be friends with every single directee! But, there is a clear line and I don’t cross it. I stay in my lane. I have come to love these people who are vulnerable and share their stories, I just love them so much.
Retreat House: Sounds like you’re biggest joy and challenge are the same!
Verriere: It really is! It is a joy for them to share and that leads me to the challenge – I just want to be besties with everyone!
“The spiritual journey includes many heights and many depths, and I see it as more of a spiraling gyroscope than an upward climb; I believe that when life unravels it’s often because something new and usually beautiful is being re-woven. Spiritual direction can lead to experiencing more freedom, peace and purpose. I would be honored to accompany you through this process.”
Learn more about Kim. Interested in practical tools for growing your ministry, check out this blog post.
This article was by Emily Turner Watson. Emily is a trained spiritual director, storyteller and writer. Part of her ministry is to bring healing, truth and joy through active listening and writing. Have a story to share or interested in direction? She would love to hear from you.