When we entered March of 2020, and Covid lockdown had begun, I had no idea the many gifts, healings and invitations that God had planned for me over the next 12 months.  I’d like to take a moment and share with you the first one that took place after a hidden, decades-long wound was suddenly opened.

I was attending my last church service, before everything closed down.  For 2 years I had been recovering from a severe physical injury, and depression and anxiety had become my companions.  I barely had any faith for myself and my healing, just enough to show up to church, hoping to receive something….anything.

The pastor began his sermon: “God is not interested in your happiness.”

After this first sentence, I heard little else.  I had no idea where he went with his sermon, and but it didn’t matter.  Those words were devastating to my spirit.  I suffered through the rest of the service, and went home.

Over the next couple of weeks, I had a lot of time to reflect on those words.  That one sentence had broken me open. In the deepest part of me, the part grounded in an intimate relationship with God, I thought I believed that those words were not true.  But I also knew that those words were not new to me.  I had heard them from other shepherds in one form or another, all my life.  I began to notice an intense struggle between what I thought I knew to be true, and 50 years of religious teaching, and I began to doubt my knowing.  Was happiness really part of God’s desire for me?

As the days went by, my memory refreshed, I became aware of ways, subtle and overt, that this pastor’s message had been imparted to me over decades.   As a result, I held a deep belief that being disinterested in my happiness was part of God’s character.  This belief, this wound, over shadowed all else, all other knowings.  Once this was all revealed to me, the Beloved stepped in to heal in a very surprising way. 

One afternoon in early April, I opened an online news site to find an article announcing that The Greater Good Science Center at UC Berkley was going to be offering their 11 week “The Science of Happiness” course, free to all for the spring semester.  I was immediately drawn in, feeling a rush of expectancy, and I registered right away.

I spent the next 11 weeks immersing myself in this wonderful course and I loved every minute of it.  At the time, it spoke to the part of me that needed to distance myself from doctrine and religious teaching, because that was what had profoundly wounded me.   God knew what I needed and began to speak to me and heal me through the science.  Professors and researchers shared their findings and taught a new happiness practice every week.  I learned how these happiness practices benefit the health of the body, and how we are wired, created, for compassion, empathy, and connection.  All of these contribute to our well-being and happiness.  This was just the tip of the iceberg.

Throughout the entire course I felt the Beloved’s presence with me very profoundly.  I felt the Spirit’s blessing and joy every time I was given a new revelation that healed me and validated my knowing.  I felt the Creator’s assurance, “See how I have created you, the miracle that you are.  I care very much and I am deeply interested in your happiness.  I will continue to heal you and lead you there.”

I am so grateful.   

As part of this sharing, I invite you to consider taking the course.  It is still being offered for free. 

I also invite you to consider attending a Summit being offered next weekend “Life After COVID-Preparing Yourself for a New Normal”, May 21-23.  It is also free and it is sponsored by the Greater Good Science Center at UC Berkley.