Retreat House

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Releasing butterflies: Finding light in the darkness

I recently saw the world premiere in Dallas of the opera The Diving Bell and the Butterfly, based on Jean-Dominique Bauby’s book of the same title. The opera beautifully depicts the real-life story of a man who suffered a massive stroke and was left paralyzed with '“locked-in” syndrome: he could only blink his left eyelid.

Bauby likened his experience to being trapped inside a diving bell and dropped into the dark depths of an ocean. But though his body was immobilized, his thoughts fluttered freely, like butterflies. Despite his limitations, Bauby was able to write a book, blinking out one letter at a time to a speech therapist.

Bauby’s story made me think of my hospice patients. Some are bedbound or confined to a wheelchair. Others have mobility but their thoughts are dimmed by Alzheimer’s disease or dementia. They are locked-in, unable to communicate clearly.

Yet when I recite the Lord’s Prayer with them or sing a familiar hymn, they often mouth the words or even join in. Somewhere deep within, their spirit still soars like a butterfly when the Divine whispers in their ear.

I am reminded of Psalm 72:26: “My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.”

Where might you or I be feeling locked in during this dark Advent season? Is there a darkness weighing you down? What spiritual practices might help release our spiritual wings?

May the Divine breath help unfold and release your butterflies, even as you wait for the fullness of light to appear.

This reflection was written by Robin Russell. She is a trained spiritual director, hospice chaplain and serves on the board of directors for Retreat House Spirituality Center.